I Got those Red-White-Blues

It’s Veterans Day here in the U.S.A., and since I’m a Vietnam Veteran, it don’t feel right to totally ignore it, though I’m sorely tempted.

Luckily, the weather’s appropriate. Dark, wet, and windy.

That’s fine with me ‘cuz I ain’t one of those flag-waving, sabre-rattling veterans.

I hated wasting Saturday mornings parading through the desert. Damn sure ain’t attending no red, white and blue parades.

I’m sitting here at home listening to Little Walter play the blues on his harmonica, remembering friends that didn’t come home.

Remembering how the only three Vietnam Veterans at Prairie High School always met out in the parking lot on Veterans Day Assemblies, refusing to glorify war rather than honor the sacrifice all veterans made, especially those who died there.

Couldn’t embed
Springsteen’s “Born in the USA,” but in my opinion it’s still the best Vietnam rock-song ever. Judging from the comments, not everyone would seem to agree with that opinion. But the most important thing I ever learned from Vietnam was to “Think for Yourself.” And I guess Vietnam was a small price to pay for that.

Jorge Luis Borges: Selected Poems

I finally managed to get around to reading Jorge Luis Borges: Selected Poems, edited by Alexander Coleman. I’m not sure how long it’s been sitting around, but it’s, relatively, a recent purchase, not a leftover from my college years. Still, I bought it long enough ago that I have no memory of why I bought it, other than some vague feeling of guilt that I’ve never read a single South American poet except for the occasional translation in the works of an American poet. Perhaps reading such poems inspired me to make this purchase. Whatever the reason, the experience so far has been surprisingly pleasant, so pleasant that I ordered a book of his short stories from Amazon a few minutes ago, and a book of poems by Neruda, inspired by this short essay on the The Ghost of Whitman in Neruda and Borges, an essay I found while looking online for a copy of the poem so I wouldn’t have to type it or scan it myself.

In one of his introductions Borge mentions Walt Whitman, and I suspect it’s the Whitmanesque lines in

MY WHOLE LIFE

Here once again the memorable lips, unique and like yours.
I kept getting close to happiness and have stood in the shadow of suffering.
I have crossed the sea.
I have known many lands; I have seen one woman and two or three men.
I have loved a girl who was fair and proud, with a Spanish quietness.
I have seen the city’s edge, an endless sprawl where the sun goes down
tirelessly, over and over.
I have relished many words.
I believe deeply that this is all and that I will neither see nor accomplish
new things.
I believe that my days and my nights in their poverty and their riches are
the equal of God’s and of all men’s.

that originally attracted me to it. Although the repetition of “I” here seems an obvious tribute to Whitman, the more important similarity lies in the last line, “I believe that my days and my nights in their poverty and their riches are the equal of God’s and of all men’s.” Although Borge’s heritage is anything but “common,” he seems to go out of the way in his poetry to try to be “everyman,” while, like Whitman, insisting on his individuality, recalling these lines from “Song of Myself”

I CELEBRATE myself, and sing myself,
And what I assume you shall assume,
For every atom belonging to me as good belongs to you.

Many of my favorite Borges’ early poems emphasize this commonality and the individual finding himself in those common experiences.

But no matter how much Borge admired Whitman, he is definitely a “modern” poet, and much of the poetry in later books remind me more of Hermann Hesse than Whitman. That’s particularly true of the prose poems included from “The Maker.” I think I’ve mentioned that I’m not particularly fond of “prose poems,” which seem like a contradiction of terms to me. However, Borge’s prose poems remind me an awful lot of “The Fairy Tales of Hermann Hesse,” a book I reviewed a long time ago, January of 2002, to be exact, and I was quite fond of those “fairy tales.” Like, Hesse, Borge often seems to be trying to discover his role as artist, as in

EVERYTHING AND NOTHING
 
THERE was no one in him; behind his face (which even through the bad paintings of those times resembles no other) and his words, which were copious, fantastic and stormy, there was only a bit of coldness, a dream dreamt by no one. At first he thought that all people were like him, but the astonishment of a friend to whom he had begun to speak of this emptiness showed him his error and made him feel always that an individual should not differ in outward appearance. Once he thought that in books he would find a cure for his ill and thus he learned the small Latin and less Greek a contemporary would speak of; later he considered that what he sought might well be found in an elemental rite of humanity, and let himself be initiated by Anne Hathaway one long June afternoon. At the age of twenty-odd years he went to London. Instinctively he had already become proficient in the habit of simulating that he was someone, so that others would not discover his condition as no one; in London he found the profession to which he was predestined, that of the actor, who on a stage plays at being another before a gathering of people who play at taking him for that other person. His histrionic tasks brought him a singular satisfaction, perhaps the first he had ever known; but once -the last verse had been acclaimed and the last dead man withdrawn from the stage, the hated flavour of unreality returned to him. He ceased to be Ferrex or Tamberlane and became no one again. Thus hounded, he took to imagining other heroes and other tragic fables. And so, while his flesh fulfilled its destiny as flesh in the taverns and brothels of London, the soul that inhabited him was Caesar, who disregards the augur’s admonition, and Juliet. who abhors the lark, and Macbeth, who converses on the plain with the witches who are also Fates. No one has ever been so many men as this man who like the Egyptian Proteus could exhaust all the guises of reality. At times he would leave a confession hidden away in some corner of his work, certain that it would not be deciphered; Richard affirms that in his person he plays the part of many and Iago claims with curious words ‘I am not what I am’. The fundamental identity of existing, dreaming and acting inspired famous passages of his.
 
For twenty years he persisted in that controlled hallucination, but one morning he was suddenly gripped by the tedium and the terror of being so many kings who die by the sword and so many suffering lovers who converge, diverge and melodiously expire. That very day he arranged to sell his theatre. Within.. a week he had returned to his native village, where he recovered the trees and rivers of his childhood and did not relate them to the others his muse had celebrated, illustrious with mythological allusions and Latin terms. He had to be ‘someone: he was a retired impresario who had made his fortune and concerned himself with loans, lawsuits and petty usury. It was in this character that he dictated the arid will and testament known to us, from which he deliberately excluded all traces of pathos or literature. His friends from London would visit his retreat and for them he would take up again his role as poet.
 
History adds that before or after dying he found himself in the presence of God and told Him: ‘I who have been so many men in vain want to be one and myself.’ The voice of the Lord answered from a whirlwind: ‘Neither am I anyone; I have dreamt the world as you dreamt your work, my Shakespeare, and among the forms in my dream are you, who like myself are many and no one.’

This search for identity seems to be a particularly modern theme. Perhaps that’s because modern life forces us to fit so many different roles, roles we ourselves begin to accept as self defining. Personally, I always found it a little odd that people invariably introduce themselves by announcing their occupation, especially since I never defined myself that way.

Which is not to say I haven’t spent considerable time trying to discover who I am, or, at least, discover what I believe, which seems to me a more accurate way of defining who I am, though perhaps not as accurate as “among the forms in my dream are you, who like myself are many and no one.”

Tagged

I’ll have to admit that I was somewhat ambivalent last week when I discovered that steven of
The Golden Fish had tagged me. I was pleased that someone whose blog I like had chosen to honor me, particularly when the other blogs he tagged seemed first rate.

On the other hand, I’ve never been particularly fond of tagging, particularly being “it.” I have a hard enough time just trying to come up with something I think interesting enough to write about here when I’m given unlimited freedom. It’s much harder when I feel obliged to follow some kind of prompt, particularly a prompt like this one that asks the blogger to:

rule the one. link to the person who tagged you.
rule the second. post the rules on your blog.
rule the third. write six random things about yourself.
rule the four. tag six people at the end of your post and link to them.
rule the fifth. let each person know they’ve been tagged and leave a comment on their blog.
rule the sixth. let the tagger know when your entry is up
.

First, I’m pretty sure that some time in the last seven years of blogging I’ve actually played this game of tag before. I’ve certainly promoted fellow bloggers repeatedly, many of whom have been blogging long enough to have been tagged before, too. As I’ve mentioned before, my blog list generally begins with the blogs that first linked to me and ends with blogs that I’ve only recently discovered and linked to, and who have probably linked to me.

Now, it’s not too difficult following the first two rules, which is why that’s already been done. The third rule, however, is a little more difficult. After seven years of blogging I’m pretty sure I’ve told readers nearly everything about my life that is even slightly interesting. That’s what drives me to constantly go out seeking new experiences and new ideas in books. Unfortunately, I don’t really remember which random things about myself I’ve already covered. At my age, everything seems new at some point, but my grandkids are quick to point out that “you said that before, grandpa.”

Long ago, when Jonathon Delacour was still blogging, I revealed that I was an INTP. Recently, though when I took online tests I discovered that I was no longer an INTP, at least if I were to believe the new tests. Instead, I’m an INFJ. I’m wondering if it’s normal to change types over long periods of time, or when you change professions.

I often say that since I’ve retired I’ve learned to live my life one day at a time. Looking back, though, I wonder if that hasn’t always been true. I remember back in high school when I took an aptitude test, it said that I had multiple interests and multiple skills, but it provided me with no particular guidance on what kind of career I should pursue — which may explain how I ended up becoming a high school English teacher instead of a physicist. I went to college “to get an education,” not to prepare for a career.

I actually entered the University of Washington as a physics major with advanced status in mathematics. When I saw my counselor, I signed up for English classes, one physics class, and nary a math class. Never took another math class in my life, though trigonometry helped me when I took Advanced Mortar training in the Army.

I’m sure most people in my life would’ve classified me as a “nerd,” or at the very least, an “intellectual.” They’d be wrong. At heart, I’ve always been a “jock.” One of my few regrets in life is that my dad wouldn’t let me sign up for football in high school. I’m fond of birding, photography, and poetry, but I’m a fanatic Husky fan, managing to make it through most of the Huskies last eleven games, eleven straight losses.

I know I’ve said it many times before, but I’d have to say that my defining characteristic is my stubbornness. The best way to insure I will do something is to tell me I can’t do it.

I’m not going to tag anyone with this, but the main reason I’m writing is this is so that I can mention six bloggers I’ve recently discovered that I find worth reading regularly. I try to make sure that I link to bloggers who link to me and who I’ve read regularly for a few weeks, but I’m not sure how many of my readers actually pay attention to the bottom of my long list of blog links.

So, without further ado, here’s six blogs I’ve started following relatively recently, besides The Golden Fish, of course:

The Solitary Walker

Dominic Rivron

Living Next Door to Alice

Twisted Rib

Weaver of Grass

Beating the Bounds

Oh, and I guess I’m going to skip rules 5 and 6. If they don’t actually read my blog, there’s probably no reason to make them come here and read this.

Butterflies, and More Butterflies

One of the reasons photographers are willing to fork out big bucks for expensive lenses is that they produce amazingly sharp pictures, as I’ve discovered since I bought my first L-Series Canon Lens.

At their best they produce crisp photos like this:

Common Blue Morpho

However, if you you look at the photograph carefully you will notice that there is an extremely limited depth of field even with this lens, about the width of the butterfly’s body.

Thus, it becomes extremely challenging to produce a sharp picture when there are two subjects in the picture, as in this photo.

Pair of Butterflies

It helps if there’s a lot of light, which there wasn’t the day I took these pictures. Notice how only one wing of the butterfly on the right is in sharp focus. It’s an inevitable compromise.

I’ve always thought of butterflies as timid insects that managed to stay alive by avoiding conflict. That’s why I was fascinated by these two butterflies who seemed to actually be fighting over these small purple flowers. I ended up taking nearly fifteen shots in a 10 minute sequence, but it seemed impossible to get both of the butterflies in focus. This seemed the best shot in the sequence, but you’ll notice that parts of both of the butterflies is out of focus, while other parts seem quite sharp.

Pair of Butterflies on Purple Flowers

Luckily,it’s challenges like this that keep me photographing.