I’m feeling a little guilty that unlike many of my blogging buddies I don’t have any exciting New Year’s Resolutions that I can break in the next few weeks. However, I’ve never felt the need to make resolutions, nor that they would do much good if I did make them.
Of course, I could resolve not to get cancer this year, but my body doesn’t seem to listen too well to what the rest of me is telling it or I wouldn’t have gotten cancer twice already.
I guess I could resolve to lose a few pounds but then I would have to give up eating, one of the great joys in my life, one I constantly try to balance against staying in shape for the hiking I love almost as much as I do eating.
Instead of resolutions, then, perhaps I’ll just present one of my favorite Van Morrison songs and resolve to listen to Van more this year in order to remain in a good mood longer.
“Dweller On The Threshold”
I’m a dweller on the threshold
And I’m waiting at the door
And I’m standing in the darkness
I don’t want to wait no more
I have seen without perceiving
I have been another man
Let me pierce the realm of glamour
So I know just what I am
I’m a dweller on the threshold
And I’m waiting at the door
And I’m standing in the darkness
I don’t want to wait no more
Feel the angel of the present
In the mighty crystal fire
Lift me up consume my darkness
Let me travel even higher
I’m a dweller on the threshold
As I cross the burning ground
Let me go down to the water
Watch the great illusion drown
I’m a dweller on the threshold
And I’m waiting at the door
And I’m standing in the darkness
I don’t want to wait no more
I’m gonna turn and face the music
The music of the spheres
Lift me up consume my darkness
When the midnight disappears
I will walk out of the darkness
And I’ll walk into the light
And I’ll sing the song of ages
And the dawn will end the night
I’m a dweller on the threshold
And I’m waiting at the door
And I’m standing in the darkness
I don’t want to wait no more
I’m a dweller on the threshold
And I cross some burning ground
And I’ll go down to the water
Let the great illusion drown
I’m a dweller on the threshold
And I’m waiting at the door
And I’m standing in the darkness
I don’t want to wait no more
I’m a dweller on the threshold
Dweller on the threshold
I’m a dweller on the threshold
I’m a dweller on the threshold
I don’t claim to know exactly what the song means, even after reading the various definitions of the phrase “dweller on the threshold,” but I know it has been my favorite song for a long time and am planning on having it played repeatedly at my funeral, not that I’m planning on rushing that.
I’ve felt for a long time that I’m on the threshold of a better self but have never quite become that better self. Hopefully blogging is a part of discovering “just what I am,” and I’m also hoping it will help “me travel even high.”